JUST JANE: Today our agony aunt Jane O’Gorman is dealing with a new issue from a Daily Star reader who is sick of being edged out by snappy mutts
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Barrier method
I regret allowing dogs on our bed because I’m convinced my girl now deliberately uses them as a physical barrier. A canine form of contraception.
When they’re wedged in between us there’s no chance of sex. I’m tired of being pushed away and rejected – and the pooches growling in my ear – any time I get frisky.
There’s no denying that the sexual side of our relationship is in free fall.
I worked abroad a lot earlier this year and our sex life has not recovered. I encouraged her to get our two dogs to keep her company while I was away but now, they sleep on the bed, and she is definitely more interested in them than me.
The other thing is that my girl has become very body conscious and unimaginative. Any time we do manage to lock the dogs in the kitchen and make love, it’s invariably rushed and in the dark – and I’m convinced she fakes her orgasms.
How do I turn back the clock?
JANE SAYS: I suspect you need to get to know each other all over again. Forced time apart has led to awkwardness and new challenges. Take sex off the menu and suggest date nights. Be kind and loving towards her in everyday life and make it clear that she’s valued and cherished.
If your partner has confidence issues, then suggest a healthier lifestyle and fitness programme together. If she is resentful of the time, you spent away, then encourage her to talk about her feelings and fears.
We all love our dogs, but your pooches clearly require their own beds, in another part of the property, and that’s a concession that she needs to make to you. Find a compromise. Surely your relationship must come first.
Cheeky beggar has no shame
When I first met my boyfriend, he was recently divorced and renting a swanky flat. He had work and cash from the sale of his family home. We had some fun times for a few months. Sadly, his work dried up last September. Now he’s back living with his mother but simply expects me to sub him.
Whenever we meet up, he sits back while I pay for meals and drinks. More than once he’s blatantly asked for cash. The truth is that I don’t actually know him that well.
How do I finish things without appearing cruel or mean? Obviously, nothing that has happened has been his fault, but how is it my job to make up the shortfall?
JANE SAYS: Situations change. These days your boyfriend finds himself broke. From being married in a home of his own, he’s now crashing with his mother, which can’t be easy.
He must be feeling insecure, but you can’t stay with him out of sympathy. If you don’t genuinely love the guy or feel you have anything in common, then level with him.
Explain that you have pressures and financial commitments of your own that you need to focus on. Perhaps, you and he might have gone the distance in a different set of circumstances, but these are very challenging times.
He assumes, you’ll prop him up, but you must consider your own bills and mental limits too.
Wish him all the best for the future and suggest he checks he’s getting all the benefits he’s entitled to.
#Jealous #dogs #bed #killed #intimacy #canine #contraception
